I don’t believe many people understand the concept of battling demons in your mind and still trying to smile through hell’s fire. It’s easy to consume yourself in the flames and allow your lungs to drown in smoke until you lose the ability to breathe. Drops of sweat leak from your forehead and your heartbeat rise with the tune of negative thoughts consuming your mind like a forest fire. Even when the reaction of suffocation leaves your body, you still feel the ruin of your former self and the shame of allowing fire to consume your mind. You take a minute to compose yourself: sip a drink of water, and still try to smile through your yellow-stained teeth. After all, isn’t it easier to consume yourself in fire than to sort out the ashes?
Life isn’t this perfect world that we imagined for ourselves. It’s not this Garden of Eden with an abundant amount of resources, confidence, and grace. The world is too limited, insecure, and selfish for us to understand. We expect more out of this world than it is willing to give or even provide for us. We don’t know the exact reason, but we still try to act like we’re entitled to everything and everyone that comes across our path in life. We settle for toxic relationships, unhappiness, and sacrifice our dreams to make other people happy. You may even think this is selfless, but let me tell you that you’re allowing yourself to be consumed in the fire.
You have to understand that you are the only one living your life and no one else can save you except yourself. There isn’t going to be this attractive heroic fireman ready to battle your forest fire and whisk you off to your fairytale love story. Come on, let’s be a little realistic. You can have dreams and passion that drives your heart and mind, but you need to be careful in who you give your precious time to. Not everyone will appreciate your creative mind and sunlit soul. People will try to use you, criticize you, and even mock your dreams in order to keep you in the flames. And you need to be brave enough to stand against it and fight for yourself.
You need to cut people off who don’t truly value you and your heart. Break contact with them and move on with your life. You can still love them and the memories you shared with them, but life is too short to be consumed in the flames. Once you do this, you will breathe easier and the smoke will clear out of your lungs. The air will be fresh and new, not polluted with negative words and actions. There will be a new Genesis to live up to in your life. Blessings coming your way and showering you like rain to water down your furious fire until all that’s left are the ashes.
Go and trade your ashes for beauty. Uproot your life and spread your ashes on all the areas that need to regrow. Develop your current relationships, make new ones, and find your passions again. Live up to the person you want to be and don’t worry too much about the people who don’t understand your dreams. You have so much to live for and life is too beautiful to be wasted on people or things that don’t even matter. Learn to forgive those who’ve hurt you in the past and progress towards your future with open arms. Besides, didn’t God create us for a purpose? So live up to it and breathe again.
“And provide for those who grieve in Zion-to bestow on them a crown of beauty instead of ashes, the oil of joy instead of mourning, and a garment of praise instead of a spirit of despair.”
– Isaiah 61:3