Self-Reflection and Change

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There are many things in the world we want to be and hope to be. Many things we wish that can happen and to live for. We all want a purpose, a mantra, and a love for what we do in our lives. However, there are times we fall short of our expectations and make mistakes along the way. We say hurtful words, gossip, slander, or mistreat someone with our actions or inaction. Sometimes, it can be too overwhelming and frustrating to come to terms with our vulnerabilities and flaws. Yet, its in these failures that we learn how to be better people and friends.

I have to admit that I’m not perfect. I have to understand that I’ve hurt many people with my lies, actions, and inability to sympathize with others. Although I try to apologize and to clarify what I mean, the hurt is still there and sometimes even the regret. I need to be honest with who I am and what I can do or don’t do. I need to be more careful in how I approach others with problems and to not make it about myself. I need to learn love and how to better love others.

Sometimes I set the bar too high for me to reach.  Instead of taking baby steps, I take a huge leap ahead and forget the risks involved. I’m impulsive and needy. I can be the absolute worst and I’m a huge procrastinator. To be honest, I’m not the person that can be easily relied on for support. I know this is my biggest weakness and flaw. I know I’ve hurt many people with my inaction to charge my phone, answer messages, and keeping up-to-date with people’s lives. And the way I handle situations can be petty and rude.

Those are the absolute worst parts of me that I need to reveal towards others. I need to be more reflective and understanding. I need to be punctual and responsible. I need to do these things because they are necessary for my well-being but how do I change to be a better person? How can I redeem myself from the hurt I’ve caused?

I know saying sorry isn’t enough anymore. I can’t keep making excuses to make other people happy or to conceal the truth in how I feel about them. I know this isn’t right and I need to change. Change is vital to everyone’s survival. It’s not just about you and me anymore. The whole world is involved in how we react and don’t react. We need to self-reflect to know our sins and learn how to change them.

So as a self-reflection: I will learn to be kinder, to make time for the people I love, and to better serve others before myself. I won’t make commitments that I can’t fulfill and I will make more of an effort to be a better person. For those I’ve hurt and done wrong, I am sorry. Tell me ways I can be a better person. Tell me how you feel but don’t condemn me. Help me to solve the problem but the forgiveness part is up to you. Either way, I wish you love and happiness in life. Don’t put up with people like me because you deserve better than what I can offer you. 

Remember, sometimes the act of letting go is vital to change. Self-reflect and understand that you’re not the same person as you were yesterday. Look at your flaws as opportunities for improvement. Put the razor down and stop cutting yourself. You deserve to forgive the person you don’t like, too. Just remember to love and treat others as you would treat yourself.

Thus, Self-love equals real love to all.

~Britany

 

 

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