Have you felt embarrassed by fretting over something irrelevant? You probably have enough money in the bank to pay your bills, you have food in your stomach, and nobody is antagonizing you, so what’s the problem? Not sure but you know darn well that you shouldn’t feel the way you feel. I mean if anybody found out that you don’t have it all together, then you might lose everyone. Some people hide it better, but you’re the kind that needs to speak out. The terror doesn’t stop until you text a friend and say how you’re feeling. Is that weakness? I think not.
I found myself being stupid and allowing my anxiety to control the way I feel and act. I know with some people, they’ll gasp in disgust with my openness and brutal honesty. They’ll think I should keep my problems to myself and learn how to handle them better. But their opinion doesn’t really matter to me. I don’t care if they don’t want to listen or be there. I don’t care if they don’t have the same struggles or are too selfish to understand other people’s feelings. I guess some people just know how to control themselves better, oh well.
So what about the rest of us? Are we just too “mentally ill” to be competent adults? I don’t think so. I think its courageous that we have the ability to share our struggles and be stronger as fighters. Anxiety isn’t a “mental illness” like I’m stupid or need constant medical attention. You and I are bad ass. We have our shit together but sometimes we have our shitty days. Sometimes the brain becomes toxic and we become our own worst enemy. Does that mean we have a right to hate ourselves?
Hell no. We know that we are beautiful, smart, and capable human beings but our brain likes to play tricks on us. Anxiety doesn’t replace logic, rather anxiety intensifies our worst fears. It’s a lying freak that needs to be put back into its place. It may escape every now and then but it can’t stay for long.
The best solution is distraction. Distraction is listening to music, hanging out with friends, and writing. The most effective way is communicating those feelings into a healthy outlet so it can be confronted and destroyed. We’re in a war, so its vital we have our whole village with us.
Stay strong, stay firm, and come out fighting!