Anxiety Shell

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I hate having an anxiety shell when I first meet new people. Especially if I’m feeling especially anxious for no reason, it makes me more awkward and wordless. In those times of discomfort, I try to latch on to another person I barley met and to retain the conversation. Anything that comes to mind or superficial sounds beautiful to me at that moment. But its not going down to bare bones of a person. I wish I knew how to rid my shell faster than I do now.

I’m usually a pretty friendly person when I’m in an environment where I either know the people around me or are at least well-acquainted with the venue. Yet, when I’m in a place or with people I don’t know, I think I can come off as weird. I don’t mean to be the odd one out of the group, but my extroverted nature is tied down by anxiety. I get so anxious because I don’t know what to expect from people or how they will think of me. Most times, I feel like this short little child in a field of adults. I don’t know what’s going on, man. I’m just trying not to say the wrong things.

No matter how anxiety tries to influence me, I still make an effort to get out of my own head. I still go out and try to meet people, go to new places, and at least attempt to make conversation. By no means does that always happen, however, its still worth trying to break cycle of fear. It helps to have fellow extroverted people to break the shell when needed. When that happens, I feel blessed and relieved. I can break out of my anxiety shell and be myself.

And it helps to keep reminding yourself that you aren’t afraid of people and you’re a pretty cool bean to hang around with.

Adios social anxiety!

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